Ten Days...

That's all the time that remains until my thesis is due. Those nine days cannot pass quickly enough because I need my head to stop swarming with all these characters and their stories. Those nine days will pass entirely too quickly because I don't know if it will be ready. I mean, of course it will. I know I will put in the time to get my collection of eight stories to the best place I can get them. And I suppose after that, I just have to trust in my readers and my writing. Still, it scares me to be so close to finishing. I want this book to be publishable. I want these stories to be good. Meaningfully good. Beyond my children and the relationships in my life, this is the best thing I have ever created. And I am proud. And tired.

I don't really talk a lot about writing, and what writing means to me. For me, it just is. It's what I do for long hours on the weekend and at five o'clock in the morning and on nights when I can keep my eyes open past nine and after school when I used to work out or run errands. This year of writing and working on my collection of short stories has taught me so much about myself and writing and the world. It excites me and pains me. I see things differently because I write. I read differently. I teach differently. I probably love differently. I think it makes me a better friend, a better parent, a better teacher, and a better wife. Writing often feels like a confrontation, and every time I sit down to write and work through a word, a passage, a page, or a story, I think I grow a little.

I hope one day, my children will have the opportunity to follow their passions and their dreams. I hope they will learn to work hard and go after the success they desire. I hope they will learn to think creatively and deeply. And I hope they will know that success is not achieved in isolation. Without my thesis advisor, my writing teachers, my workshop peers, my readers (especially Shawn, my Dad, Brendan, and Jamie), all the authors I have read and admired, and support from my family and friends, I wouldn't be on the verge of finishing my collection. I completely understand why authors need a full page for acknowledgements. Throughout this whole process (working towards my MFA and writing my thesis), Shawn has been so supportive. He encourages me when I become self-conscious of my work. He watches the kids so I can work. I couldn't do this without him. Thanks, Babe.

When I was a kid, I dreamed about writing a book. Now I'm ten days away. The homestretch.

Yes, I Stalk Blogs

I recently read an article in the New York Times online about Heather Armstrong, Queen Mommy Blogger. Wow. I didn't realize the blogging world was so affluent! I didn't realize it was so dramatic. I mistakenly assumed moms blogged the way I did - to keep in touch with friends and family and document the adventures of your little ones and your life.

That being said, the phenomenon of mommy blogs fascinates me. So much so that it is the topic of one of my stories for my thesis. I consider my blog stalking research. At the same time, I enjoy looking into the lives of others for reasons beyond my writing. I love reading about women finding out they are pregnant. I am overjoyed when I find out their babies are born and everyone is home, happy and healthy. I am devastated when I hear about an unexpected diagnosis of disease. I am sad when I read about women experiencing broken bones or broken spirits. My heart is lifted when birthdays are celebrated or babies take their first steps. I am curious about the time saving tips they have to share. I enjoy following other women follow their passions. I would like to be friends with some of them. Online, it's like a perpetual multimedia girls night. I'm happy and proud to be part of that party.

If you are stalking or lurking here, welcome!

Adrian Goes Mobile

What we're up to...

1. Shawn is in DC with his students this week. That means I'm tired. I have managed to get to school early every day, which is something. I eat dinner standing up and usually holding Adrian. Friday, please get here soon! Shawn, we miss you!
2. Strawberry shortcake with Caroline yesterday!
3. Park with Irene and Natasha today!
4. Thesis deadline (aka a complete, publishable draft of my collections of eight stories - March 21st. Yup. I'm a bit stressed. But it is coming along. I am getting better at self-editing and thinking through my stories. I cannot wait to have it finished, but I cannot imagine getting to that point either. So exciting.
5. End of the third nine weeks at school. Grading, grading, grading.
6. Riley reminded me that we couldn't buy blueberries because they weren't on sale.
7. Adrian started walking around the house with a walker.
8. I am almost two full weeks into Jillian Michael's thirty-day shred. I worked out six days last week, and already five this week. It feels so good to sweat a bit. Usually, my workout involves laundry and dishes. But I need more workouts. I feel better even after just 11 days. Now if only I could have Jillian's body...

A Riley Update!

So an update on Riley is better suited to stories and pictures. Enjoy!

1. The other night, Riley worried about ants in the bed. Shawn was out, so she was sleeping over with me, but she did not want to get in the bed. So as I am brushing my teeth, she climbs up on our eight-inch headboard, and camps out. She was still there an hour later when Shawn came home despite a ton of coaching from me to "come down from there!" That's when she decides she is going to sleep on the headboard. And not even five minutes later, she was out!

2. In the car, I sometimes talk to other cars, so I can make it through a light or pull out of the school or just drive at a decent speed. The other day, I said, "C'mon...go, go, go" to the sedan in front of us, and Riley responded with "You need to be patient, Mommy. I always tell you, you need to be patient."

3. Riley went with me the other morning to buy a few bagel packs from Panera for my students who helped run GOLD this year. Now she's hooked! Yesterday morning, she wanted to go to Panera for a "milkshake and bagel" after gymnastics. Girl after my own heart. Who knew fondness for Panera was genetic? Her new fav is my current fav: whole grain bagel with butter. It was so nice getting to sit down just the two of us with our bagels and the smoothie we split to chat about the nice day and Adrian and gymnastics and school. I know how much I cherish those coffee shop outings with my parents, and I am so happy to start enjoying them with Riley.

4. When she talks about her friends at school, Riley commonly refers to her peers as students.

5. She has started to pull out books at home and ask the rest of us to sit down for circle time, so she can read to us. Future English teacher??

6. She is becoming so communicative. She comments on how beautiful the day is, tell us what she likes about her brother ("He's cute, except he gets my toys."), discusses plans for her birthday ("dinosaurs and lizards, and strawberry pizza and banana cake"), and shares what she is looking forward to about turning three ("I'll get a new car seat and be able to reach everything!").

7. She's proud that she can buckle the middle buckle of her car seat. She can color in between the lines. She knows how to operate a DVD player and dress herself. She hates getting her hair brushed, and I really hope that's a phase because her hair is getting so long and beautiful. She gives big hugs and kisses, and she is so gentle with her brother.

8. And except for some naps and nighttime, she is potty-trained!

An Adrian Update

Favorite Foods -
Bananas
Peas
Toast
Cheerios
Sweet Potatoes

Favorite Noises to Make -
Ba-ba
Ga-ga
Ma-ma
Endless babbling
Occasional shrieks and screeches when he gets really excited

Favorite Moves -
Crawling all over the house (his hands make the cutest slapping noises on the tile)
Crawling right over to where Riley is!
Pulling himself up on our pant legs
Pulling himself up, period!

Favorite Objects to Put in His Mouth -
Wii remotes
Banana peels
Socks

Least Favorite Things -
Laying down for diaper changes
Getting put in his car seat
Baby food purees

Riley's update requires a few recent photos. Hopefully, I will have it up tonight.

GOLD: A Fourth Fantastic Event!

Last night/this morning, we had GOLD at Oak Hall. GOLD stands for Girls Overnight Leadership Development. For more info, check my post from last February. I feel so strongly about this program. It is such a wonderful way of encouraging girls to be proud of themselves and develop their self-confidence. I went through GOLD as an eighth grader at North Allegheny, I brought the program to Jamestown High School with my twin sister when we were seniors, and now GOLD is at Oak Hall. What a journey! And yes, it is a lot of work. And yes, it is hard to stay up ALL NIGHT. But when I look around at a group of eighth grade, junior, and senior girls having a ball and confronting some major issues they may face in the coming years with poise and maturity, I am overwhelmed.

Seriously, someone give me a grant so I can bring GOLD to schools across the country! I would, in a heartbeat (and continue to write on the side, of course!). The transition between middle and high school is fragile, delicate - especially for girls. GOLD provides a bridge. I love being a part of that.

This year's highlights:
1. Zumba at midnight
2. Dance game on the wii
3. Crazy cookie decorating
4. Tie-dyed shirts
5. Spending time with an amazing group of young women!